好笑的英语笑话故事1 Photoofmywife我老婆的照片 Abusinessmanentersatavern(酒馆，客栈),sitsdownatthebar,andordersadouble下面是小编为大家整理的2023年好笑英语笑话故事,菁选3篇,供大家参考。
好笑的英语笑话故事1
Photo of my wife 我老婆的照片
A businessman enters a tavern(酒馆，客栈), sits down at the bar, and orders a double martini on the rocks. After he finishes the drink, he peeks inside his shirt pocket, and then orders the bartender(酒保) to prepare another double martini. After he finishes that, he again peeks inside his shirt pocket and orders the bartender to bring another double martini. The bartender says, "Look, buddy, I"ll bring ya" martinis all night long - but you gotta tell me why you look inside your shirt pocket before you order a refill." The customer replies, "I"m peekingat a photo of my wife. When she starts to look good, I know it"s time to go home."
一个生意人走进一家酒馆，在吧台坐下，点了一杯加冰的双料马提尼。喝完，那生意人往自己衬衣的口袋里瞥了一眼，然后又让服务员把杯子满上。喝完，生意人又往自己衬衣的口袋里瞥了一眼，然后又让服务生帮他把杯子满上。这时酒馆的服务生说话了，“呃，老兄，我整个晚上给你倒马提尼都没有问题，但你得告诉我，你为什么在点下一杯酒前都要往自己衬衣的口袋里偷偷看那么一眼”。生意人回答，“我看的是我老婆的一张照片。如果照片上的人开始变得好看起来，那就说明我喝得差不多了，该回家了。”
好笑的英语笑话故事2
A judge in a small city was hearing a drunk-driving case and the defendant1, who had both a record and a reputation for driving under the influence, demanded a jury trial. It was nearly 4 p. m. and getting a jury would take time, so the judge called a recess2 and went out in the hall looking to impanel anyone available for jury duty. He found a dozen lawyers in the main lobby and told them that they were a jury.
The lawyers thought this would be a novel experience and so followed the judge back to the courtroom. The trial was over in about 10 minutes and it was very clear that the defendant was guilty. The jury went into the jury-room, the judge started getting ready to go home, and everyone waited.
After nearly three hours, the judge was totally out of patience and sent the bailiff into the jury-room to see what was holding up the verdict. When the bailiff returned, the judge said, "Well have they got a verdict yet?"
The bailiff shook his head and said, "Verdict? Hell, they"re still doing nominating speeches for the foreman"s position!"
在一个小城市，一位法官正在审理一起酒后驾车案件。被告不仅有过酒后驾车的记录，而且声誉也不是太好，现在只是缺少一个陪审团作出裁决。因为已经接近下午四点，找个陪审团来会耽误很多时间。因此，法官宣布休庭后，就到外面随便挑选了一些人来充当陪审团。刚一出门，他就发现大 厅刚好有12个律师，便请求他们充当陪审团。
听了法官的话，这些律师们认为这将会是一次新奇的经历，因此，便跟随法官回到了法庭。不到10分钟，案子就已接近尾声，因为被告明显是有罪的。陪审团回到陪审室进行商议，法官就等着宣布结果，马上回家。每个人都在等待着最后的判决。
大概过了3个小时，法官已经彻底失去了耐心，便派法警去看看判决为什么耽误了这么久。当法警回来后，法官问他：“怎么样?他们是否作出了最后的判决?”
法警摇摇头说：“判决?天啊，他们为了推选陪审团*，还在进行演讲呢!”
好笑的英语笑话故事3
A defending attorney was cross examining a coroner.
The attorney asks, "Before you signed the death certificate had you taken the man"s pulse?"
The coroner says, "No."
The attorney then asks, "Did you listen for a heart beat?"
"No."
"So when you signed the death certificate you had not taken any steps to make sure the man was dead, had you?"
The coroner, now tired of the brow beating says, "Well, let me put it this way. The man"s brain was sitting in a jar on my desk, but for all I know he could be out there practicing law somewhere."
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